I know this topic is a bit old, but I haven't seen a good answer, and I have the same problems setting up a muli-site multi-language system.
I tried to work around the problem by using 2-letter language codes for site1, and 3-letter codes for site2.
Problem is: you have to make sure that the user doesn't end up in the wrong site if he/she uses the 2-letter code instead of the 3-letter one or vice-versa.
I tried to fix this using also host matching, but the combination of host and uri matching (MatchOrder:host;uri) doesn't work. See my other post (still unanswered): http://ez.no/community/forum/install_configuration/how_to_create_multiple_multilingual_sites_in_one_install
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